Sidebar with Floating Button
Vichekesho vya AckySHINE
☰
AckyShine

Angalia nilivyoingizwa mjini na ujanja wangu wote

Featured Image

Ndio nilikuwa nimeshuka kwenye basi la SAI BABA pale Ubungo, nina Begi kubwa Mgongoni na begi Dogo la Lap Top mkononi, sura inatazama Mbele Very Serious kama nipo kwenye Gwaride la Uhuru!..Mabega juu yanafanya Cheers na Mawingu!, natembea kwa madoido…..leo nimetoka Likizo Moshi,

"Brother Simu ya ukweli hii..kitu cha Tecno C9 bei poa" hii ilikuwa sauti ya Teja mmoja hivi!

Yaani huyu Teja Bwege kweli,anataka kumuuzia nani sabuni? mimi sio wa kuja!…kamwe Siwezi kuibiwa hapa Town,hakuna wizi au utapeli nisioujua!, Mimi nimezaliwa Mwananyamala kwa Manjunju, nikalelewa Tandale kwa Mtogole, Shule ya msingi nimesoma Turiani Magomeni, Hivi Mbwa gani aniibie?…kwa Style ipi?

Sipendi kabisa Upuuzi!, Wajinga ndio wataibiwa, sio Mimi!…sasa Kwa mwendo wa haraka nikatoka nje kabisa ya Stendi ya Ubungo straight mpaka Stendi ya dala dala za Kariakoo, hapo ndipo nikakutana na Vijana wawili wadogo wakiwa na mzani wa kupimia uzito,…hakika napenda sana vijana wanaojituma kama hawa na sio ile Mijizi ya kule ndani Stendi!!,….hapa sasa nikapata wazo!

"Dogo mnapima uzito kwa shilingi ngapi?''

"Mia mbili tu Kaka!"

''Ok"

Kwa mwendo wa kikakamavu nikapanda juu ya mzani,lengo hapa ni kujua uzito wangu, Mtori niliokula mwezi mzima kule kwa Mshekuu sio mchezo, hapa nahisi nacheza kwenye kg za John Cena,

"Mama wee! Dogo mzani mzima huu kweli? Mbona nina kilo 134?" (Nilihamaki)

"Aaah! Brother huoni umepanda na Mabegi juu ya mzani?'''

Hahaha! kweli nimechanganyikiwa!…Sasa nikatoa mabegi yote mawili na kurudi juu ya Mzani, hapa ndipo Uzito ukashuka kutoka kg 134 mpaka kg 56!…My God kweli Body la "One Pack " haliongopi! thats means mabegi yaliniongezea kg 78! duh hii ni hatari!

"Yaani we Dogo kitambi chote hiki kg 56? huu Mzani Mzima kweli?"

Kimya…

"Dogo huu Mzani vipi?"

Kimya…

Dogo ana dharau huyu!…Sasa ndio nikabandua macho yangu toka kwenye kioo cha mzani ili nimtazame huyu dogo asiyejibu!….ndipo macho yangu yakakutana na Kigoda tupu kilichochongwa Mvomero!…Dogo hakuwepo!….na Mabegi pia hayapo!…lap top haipo!….NIMEPIGWA!

Ni dhahiri watoto wa Mjini walikuwa wameniacha juu ya Mzani, wamechukua Lap top ya Milioni na wameniachia Mzani chakavu wa elfu 40, what a stress!….sasa nilirudisha macho kwenye kioo cha uzito na sasa kilisoma KG 38!…yaani dakika hii hii nimepungua kilo zingine 18, Hakiyamama nahisi hata utumbo wangu wamebeba!…niitieni Ambulance!

πŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌπŸ™†πŸΌ

AckySHINE Solutions

Comments

Please Join AckySHINE to Participate in Discussion.

Rose Lowassa (Guest) on July 10, 2024

πŸ‘πŸ€£πŸ˜†πŸ˜‚

Safiya (Guest) on June 24, 2024

Siwezi kusubiri kuieleza kwenye sherehe yangu inayofuata! πŸŽ‰

Bakari (Guest) on June 5, 2024

πŸ˜„ Umenishika vizuri!

Victor Sokoine (Guest) on May 31, 2024

πŸ˜† Hiyo punchline!

Salum (Guest) on April 16, 2024

🀣 Hiyo punchline ilikuwa haikutarajiwa!

Grace Mligo (Guest) on April 4, 2024

Hii ni joke ya kufurahisha sana! πŸ‘πŸ˜†

Mary Mrope (Guest) on March 5, 2024

🀣 Ninashiriki hii sasa hivi!

Dorothy Mwakalindile (Guest) on March 1, 2024

Mna talent ya jokes! πŸ‘πŸ˜‚

David Ochieng (Guest) on February 24, 2024

Nimecheka hadi mbavu zinauma πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Rose Amukowa (Guest) on February 24, 2024

Hii imenikuna hadi nina furaha! πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚

Nancy Akumu (Guest) on February 21, 2024

πŸ€£πŸ˜­πŸ˜†

Wilson Ombati (Guest) on February 14, 2024

πŸ˜† Hii imenigonga kweli!

Monica Lissu (Guest) on February 5, 2024

🀣 Hii kichekesho ni nzuri sana!

Susan Wangari (Guest) on January 21, 2024

πŸ˜†πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚

Thomas Mwakalindile (Guest) on January 15, 2024

Ucheshi wa hali ya juu! πŸ˜‚πŸ‘

Alex Nyamweya (Guest) on December 24, 2023

Napenda vile mnaweka jokes kila siku! πŸ˜†πŸ‘

Fredrick Mutiso (Guest) on December 17, 2023

πŸ˜† Ninacheka sana sasa hivi!

Mary Sokoine (Guest) on October 29, 2023

Hizi jokes ni za kipekee sana! πŸ˜†πŸ˜Š

Peter Mugendi (Guest) on October 13, 2023

Kweli mna ucheshi wa kipekee! πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

Joseph Mallya (Guest) on September 28, 2023

πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚πŸ‘ŒπŸ˜Š

Selemani (Guest) on September 3, 2023

🀣 Ninashiriki hii na kila mtu!

Catherine Mkumbo (Guest) on August 20, 2023

Umeimaliza kabisa, kichekesho gani! πŸ˜„

Linda Karimi (Guest) on August 19, 2023

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Josephine Nekesa (Guest) on August 1, 2023

Haha, hii ni kicheko bora zaidi nilichopata wiki hii! 😁

Rose Mwinuka (Guest) on July 2, 2023

πŸ˜„πŸ˜…πŸ‘πŸ˜‚

Ibrahim (Guest) on June 19, 2023

πŸ˜… Bado nacheka!

Zubeida (Guest) on June 16, 2023

Wow, hii kichekesho ni mshindi kamili! πŸ†

Abubakari (Guest) on June 10, 2023

πŸ˜ƒ Hali imeboreshwa papo hapo!

Joseph Kawawa (Guest) on June 10, 2023

πŸ˜‚πŸ‘Œ

Dorothy Majaliwa (Guest) on May 11, 2023

Ninashiriki hii na marafiki zangu mara moja! πŸ˜†

Charles Mchome (Guest) on April 14, 2023

Kweli mna ucheshi wa kipekee! πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

Sarah Achieng (Guest) on March 27, 2023

Nimecheka hadi machozi yanatoka! 🀣😭

Catherine Naliaka (Guest) on March 14, 2023

😁 Hii imenifanya siku yangu iwe bora!

Paul Kamau (Guest) on March 8, 2023

Hii kichekesho ni ya kuhifadhi bila shaka! 😁

Moses Kipkemboi (Guest) on March 7, 2023

Nimecheka hadi nimesahau shida zangu! πŸ˜…πŸ˜Š

Lucy Wangui (Guest) on February 4, 2023

Hii ni ya kufurahisha sana! πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜„

Faiza (Guest) on February 2, 2023

πŸ˜„ Kichekesho kamili!

Mary Njeri (Guest) on January 27, 2023

πŸ˜‚ Nalia kwa kweli hapa!

Neema (Guest) on January 22, 2023

🀣 Hii imewaka moto!

Salima (Guest) on January 21, 2023

Hii imeniboresha wakati wangu wa mapumziko! β˜•πŸ˜†

Henry Mollel (Guest) on January 9, 2023

Hii ni ya kufurahisha! πŸ˜„πŸ˜…

Peter Tibaijuka (Guest) on January 3, 2023

Hii imenifurahisha sana! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Richard Mulwa (Guest) on January 2, 2023

Hii imenifurahisha kweli! πŸ˜†πŸ˜‚

Sarah Achieng (Guest) on December 28, 2022

πŸ˜†πŸ‘πŸ˜‚πŸ˜„

Raha (Guest) on December 22, 2022

🀣 Ujuzi wa hali ya juu!

Diana Mumbua (Guest) on November 29, 2022

Hii ni kali kabisa! Siwezi kushiba! πŸ˜‚

Agnes Sumaye (Guest) on November 12, 2022

🀣 Hiyo twist mwishoni, ingawa!

George Ndungu (Guest) on November 5, 2022

Kweli mna ucheshi wa kipekee sana! πŸ˜„πŸ˜‚

Andrew Odhiambo (Guest) on November 1, 2022

Kama kawaida! Bado nacheka! πŸ˜„

Mary Kendi (Guest) on October 28, 2022

πŸ€£πŸ‘πŸ‘Œ

Shani (Guest) on October 14, 2022

Hii kichekesho inastahili tuzo! πŸ†

Raphael Okoth (Guest) on September 29, 2022

πŸ˜† Bado nacheka, siwezi kuacha!

Alice Jebet (Guest) on September 25, 2022

Hii imenibamba sana! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜…

Agnes Lowassa (Guest) on September 22, 2022

Kweli mnajua kuchekesha! πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

Grace Majaliwa (Guest) on September 8, 2022

Hii joke ni ya kufurahisha! 🀣🀣

Francis Njeru (Guest) on September 5, 2022

πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚πŸ€£

Josephine Nekesa (Guest) on September 5, 2022

πŸ˜† Siwezi kuacha kucheka!

Mwanajuma (Guest) on August 22, 2022

πŸ˜‚ Nacheka hadi nalia!

James Kimani (Guest) on July 15, 2022

Hii kichekesho itaingia moja kwa moja kwenye vipendwa vyangu! πŸ˜‚

Mwanaidha (Guest) on July 10, 2022

πŸ˜‚ Ninaituma hii kwa kila mtu ninayemjua!

Related Posts

Cheki tulichokifanya jana

Cheki tulichokifanya jana

JANA APA HOME

JENERETA LILIWASHWA

ACHA TUHANGAIKE KULIKUNA

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚... Read More

Mcheki Chizi na daktari

Mcheki Chizi na daktari

Tafakari na ujumbe huuuu!!!…

DAKTARI :- Unajisikiaje?

CHIZI:-Kila siku naota nyani ... Read More

Alichokisema mwizi baada ya kushinda bahati nasibu

Alichokisema mwizi baada ya kushinda bahati nasibu

Hapa mtaani kuna mwizi sugu ameshinda mil.10 za bahati nasibu ??.
Alipoulizwa atafanya nini ... Read More

Wadada acheni hizo

Wadada acheni hizo

Mfalme Sulemani alikuwa na wake 700 na alichepuka(cheated)na vimada 300 . Mpenzi wako/Mume wako u... Read More

Eti ni kweli hii ni sababu wanaume wana Upendo Sana?

Eti ni kweli hii ni sababu wanaume wana Upendo Sana?

Wanaume wana upendo kwa kweli.

Mwanaume hata akipewa kundi la wanawake 90 achague mmoja!! H... Read More

Dunia ina mambo, soma hii

Dunia ina mambo, soma hii

Dunia ina mambo

Kuna mama mmoja kavamia bank uchi cha kushangaza hakuna anae kumbuka uso... Read More

Huyu Baba ni noma, Cheki anachomjibu huyu mtoto wake

Huyu Baba ni noma, Cheki anachomjibu huyu mtoto wake

Mtoto:Β baba eti Botwasna ipo wap?

Baba:Β angalia itak... Read More

Hii dunia kweli haina haki, soma hii

Hii dunia kweli haina haki, soma hii

Unapiga kilimo chako unamsomesha girlfriend anafika chuo anakutana na msomi mwenzake anarudi ana... Read More

Hii sasa ni kali

Hii sasa ni kali

Siku izi kujuana kumezidi hata ukienda msibani kama hauna connection hauli msosi

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜... Read More

Kilichotokea kati ya mkaka na mdada walipokutana hotelini

Kilichotokea kati ya mkaka na mdada walipokutana hotelini

Mkaka aliingia kwenye hoteli moja akaketi meza moja na mdada mrembo maarufu sana;
MKAKA: Sam... Read More

Askari na yeye kumbe muoga, cheki anachomjibu afande

Askari na yeye kumbe muoga, cheki anachomjibu afande

Askari wametumwa nyumba iliyokuwa kuna ugomvi wakafika wakatakiwa kuripoti ... Read More

Kweli tamaa ni mbaya, mke wa mtu kaponzwa na tamaa, ndio basi tena

Kweli tamaa ni mbaya, mke wa mtu kaponzwa na tamaa, ndio basi tena

Jamaa kaenda kwa mke wa rafiki yake:
JAMAA: Shem nakupenda!
MKE: Hebu... Read More