Short answer: He got twelve months!
Explanation: Well, you see, when the man stole the calendar from the store, he thought he was just getting a free calendar. Little did he know, calendars have a way of keeping track of time. So, instead of escaping with his loot, he ended up with twelve whole months of his life! Talk about a hilarious twist of fate! π€£π
Mercy Atieno (Guest) on November 30, 2017
What did the triangle say to the circle? Youβre pointless! πΊβͺ
Hekima (Guest) on November 30, 2017
π I canβt stop laughing!
Chris Okello (Guest) on November 29, 2017
My life is a constant battle between wanting to be healthy and eating cupcakes. π§π₯
Frank Macha (Guest) on November 29, 2017
I may be a little quiet, but I have so many thoughts running through my mind that Iβm talking to myself non-stop. π£οΈπ
Rabia (Guest) on November 6, 2017
How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it! π€§π
Joyce Mussa (Guest) on October 31, 2017
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop! π·π₯
Wande (Guest) on October 23, 2017
Some days, I amaze myself. Other days, I look for my phone while Iβm talking on it. π±π€¦ββοΈ
Kheri (Guest) on October 21, 2017
I wonβt be impressed with technology until I can download food. ππ»
Chum (Guest) on October 16, 2017
I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what Iβm doing. πββοΈπ΄
Nassor (Guest) on October 13, 2017
My house was clean last week. Sorry you missed it. π‘π
Emily Chepngeno (Guest) on October 8, 2017
π€£ Iβm literally dying of laughter!
Zulekha (Guest) on October 7, 2017
Whatβs a snowmanβs favorite snack? Ice Krispies! βπ
Ruth Mtangi (Guest) on October 3, 2017
π You totally won the internet today!
Betty Kimaro (Guest) on October 2, 2017
I don't need a hair stylist. My pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. ποΈπββοΈ
Carol Nyakio (Guest) on September 26, 2017
π Needed this laugh, thanks!
Janet Mwikali (Guest) on September 4, 2017
π Saving this one!
Mazrui (Guest) on September 1, 2017
My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down. π¦©π
Mary Mrope (Guest) on August 30, 2017
Why donβt bananas ever get lonely? They hang out in bunches! ππ―ββοΈ
Janet Wambura (Guest) on August 12, 2017
What do lawyers wear to court? Lawsuits! π¨ββοΈπ
Stephen Kangethe (Guest) on August 11, 2017
Iβve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me. ππ
Muslima (Guest) on July 16, 2017
I canβt believe how funny this is! π
Chiku (Guest) on July 15, 2017
I can resist anything except temptation. ππ
Chris Okello (Guest) on July 7, 2017
π This is gold!
Ann Wambui (Guest) on June 20, 2017
What do you call a fly without wings? A walk! πͺ°πΆββοΈ
Fikiri (Guest) on June 15, 2017
Whatβs a witchβs favorite subject in school? Spelling! π§ββοΈπ
Raha (Guest) on June 9, 2017
Whatβs brown and sticky? A stick! πΏπ
Moses Mwita (Guest) on June 8, 2017
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I donβt know Y. π π€
Nancy Kabura (Guest) on June 7, 2017
What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep? A stega-snore-us! π¦π΄
Fikiri (Guest) on May 30, 2017
If I won the award for laziness, I would send someone to pick it up for me. ππ΄
Joy Wacera (Guest) on May 26, 2017
I used to think I was indecisive, but now Iβm not so sure. π€·ββοΈπ
Safiya (Guest) on May 21, 2017
Whatβs brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Poop! π©π€
George Wanjala (Guest) on May 20, 2017
Why do bananas wear sunscreen? Because they peel! ππ
Rose Amukowa (Guest) on May 2, 2017
What do you get when you cross a dog with a phone? A golden receiver! ππ
Mwanaidi (Guest) on April 30, 2017
π Definitely my new go-to joke!
Chris Okello (Guest) on April 29, 2017
I donβt care if the glass is half full or half empty. Iβm just glad itβs not a shot glass. π₯πΉ
Monica Adhiambo (Guest) on April 15, 2017
Absolutely hilarious! Canβt get enough! π
Moses Kipkemboi (Guest) on April 13, 2017
Why donβt basketball players ever go on vacation? Theyβre afraid of traveling! πβοΈ
Susan Wangari (Guest) on April 13, 2017
Why did I wake up tired? I went to bed tired. ππ΄
Abdillah (Guest) on April 6, 2017
If at first, you donβt succeed, then skydiving definitely isnβt for you. πͺβ
Shamim (Guest) on April 3, 2017
This just made my coffee break so much better! βπ
Rose Kiwanga (Guest) on March 31, 2017
Why are skeletons so calm? Nothing gets under their skin! ππ
Mary Kendi (Guest) on March 23, 2017
I canβt wait to tell this joke at my next party! π
Nancy Kabura (Guest) on March 23, 2017
I donβt have a bucket list, but my fucket list is a mile long. π€·ββοΈπ
Diana Mallya (Guest) on March 18, 2017
Iβve got to remember this one for later! π
Saidi (Guest) on March 13, 2017
This joke just turned my whole mood around! π
Henry Sokoine (Guest) on March 7, 2017
π I needed that laugh!
Jackson Makori (Guest) on February 11, 2017
I decided to take an aerobics class. I bent, twisted, gyrated, and jumped. And then I got stuck in my leotard. π©³π
Mwagonda (Guest) on February 4, 2017
π Nailed it!
Salima (Guest) on February 2, 2017
Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems. ππ
Stephen Kangethe (Guest) on January 30, 2017
What kind of dog can tell time? A watch dog! πβ°
Monica Lissu (Guest) on January 24, 2017
Why does cooking take six hours, but eating takes like three seconds? β²οΈπ½οΈ
Janet Sumaye (Guest) on January 11, 2017
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies! π§Ήπ
Zakia (Guest) on January 9, 2017
A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand. π§π€²
Nuru (Guest) on January 9, 2017
Why donβt you write with a broken pencil? Because itβs pointless! βοΈπ
Rose Mwinuka (Guest) on January 4, 2017
What did the duck say when it bought a snack? Put it on my bill! π¦πΏ
Bernard Oduor (Guest) on December 19, 2016
I don't sweatβI sparkle! β¨π
Rose Kiwanga (Guest) on December 15, 2016
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. πβοΈ
Peter Tibaijuka (Guest) on December 14, 2016
Iβm not lazy, Iβm on energy-saving mode. π€π
Stephen Amollo (Guest) on December 12, 2016
I canβt brain today. I has the dumb. π§ π€―
Francis Mtangi (Guest) on December 8, 2016
Why donβt scientists trust stairs? Theyβre always leading you up to something! π§ͺπͺ