Sidebar with Floating Button
Vichekesho vya AckySHINE
☰
AckyShine

Vichekesho vya kukuondoa mawazo leo

Featured Image

Soma vichekesho hivi;

Mwizi wa atm

Jamaa aliibiwa kadi yake ya benk akaulizwa kama ameripoti polisi akajibu "sijaripoti bado, mwizi mwenyewe hamfikii matumizi kama mke wangu.

Cheka kidogo

Njia rahisi kusahau matatizo yako (japo kwa muda mfupi) vaa viatu vinavyokubana.

Mlizi mbio mbio

Tulikuwa bar moja jana mlinzi kaingia spidi, akamwambia jamaa mmoja aliyekaa kaunta, Mlinzi: Mzee gari lako limeibiwa Mzee: Umemtambua aliyeiba? Mlinzi: Hapana lakini nimeandika namba za gari hizi hapa.

13, 13…

Jamaa alikuwa anapita nje ya wodi ya vichaa akasikia mtu anasema, 13, 13, 13, 13, 13, 13,….. akaamua kuchungulia kwenye kitundu alichokiona ajue kuna nini, ile kuchungulia tu akamwagiwa mchanga wa machoni, sauti ikabadili ikaanza 14,14,14,14,14……

WATAALAM

Jamaa alikuwa anaumwa sana, mkewe akamwita daktari, alipofika akamkuta jamaa kafumba macho;
Dokta: Huyu mbona amekwisha kufa?
Jamaa: Sijafa bwana
Mke: Hebu nyamaza bwana acha kubishana na wataalamu.

Ya leo mgonjwa

Dokta alipotembelea wodi ya mgonjwa wake aliyepata ajali. Mgonjwa akiwa amening'inizwa mikono juu akauliza "dokta ntaweza kweli kupiga kinanda nkitoka hospitali?"
Dokta: Bila shaka utaweza, wewe ni mpiga kinanda mzuri enh?
Mgonjwa: Hapana sijawahi kabisa bado.

4WD

Mwanaume alimnunulia pete ya almasi mkewe, rafiki akauliza "si ulisema anapenda gari yenye four wheel drive, mbona umenunua pete?" Mume akajibu "unadhani wapi ntapata rav4 feki?"

Ajali ilivyotokea

Trafiki polisi akihoji palipotokea ajali "ahaa! Sasa naanza elewa embu nielezee jinsi ajali ilivyotokea wewe ukiwa kama dereva mhusika." Dereva akajibu "hata sikumbuki nlifumba macho"

Faini ya kukojoa

Polisi alimdaka jamaa anakojoa pembezoni mwa ukuta.
Polisi: Wewe unajua panakatazwa kukojoa hapa?
Jamaa: Sasa nimebanwa nifanyaje?
Polisi: Faini yake elfu tano.
Jamaa akatoa noti ya elfu 10.
Polisi: Sasa chenji tunaipataje?
Jamaa: Tafuta chenji unipe changu.
Polisi: Basi kojoa tena…

Mume anaenda kazini

Jamaa kaamka asubuhi sana Jumamosi, mvua inanyesha kang'ang'ania kuwa anaenda ofisini. Kawasha gari yake, kufika njiani hali ilikuwa mbaya kaamua kurudi. Kafika home kavua nguo kaingia tena kitandani, kamnong'oneza mkewe aliyekuwa usingizini; "Yaani hali ya hewa huko nje mbaya sana" Mke: Si ndio nimemshangaa huyu mpumbavu eti kaenda kazini…

Hasira za mtoto

Baba na mtoto:
Baba: Mwanangu ukiwa na hasira unafanya nini?
Mtoto: Naenda chooni.
Baba: Chooni? Kufanya nini?
Mtoto: Kusafisha.
Baba: Halafu ndio hasira zinaisha?
Mtoto: Ndio. Nasafisha choo kwa mswaki wako.

Mgonjwa na Dokta

Mgonjwa: Dokta nimekuja nahisi ninaumwa Malaria na kifua.
Dokta: Sasa ushajua unaumwa nini hapa umefuata nini kwangu?
Mgonjwa: Sasa si nimekuja kwa dokta.
Dokta: Wanaojua kuwa wanaumwa kama wewe wanapitiliza maabara.

Pilau la bachela

Bachela mmoja aliyekua akiishi kwa muda mrefu peke yake kwenye nyumba aliyopanga siku moja alitaka kupika pilau kwa mara ya kwanza. Sasa asijue nini kinachobadilisha rangi ya wali kuwa rangi ya brown, yeye akapika kama kawaida (wali) kisha wakati wa kula akavaa miwani yenye rangi ambayo ukiuangalia wali unauona kama pilau wakati anakula.

Mwizi na chizi

Mwizi kaiba TV na kuanza kukimbia nayo, kumbe ile nyumba mlikuwa na chizi, akaanza kumkimbiza yule mwizi. Kila mwizi akiongeza mbio chizi nae huyo, mwishowe mwizi akasalimu amri na kusimama, yule chizi akamsogelea na kumwambia.. Daah umesahau remote hii hapa mwizi kafleti.

Chemsha bongo

Baba akimuuliza chemsha bongo mwanae anayesoma shule ya chekechea "haya niambie kitu gani hakiwezi kuliwa wakati wa breakfast?" Mtoto akajibu "hiyo mbona rahisi baba, si lunch na dinner"

AckySHINE Solutions

Comments

Please Join AckySHINE to Participate in Discussion.

Asajo the great (User) on May 8, 2026

I have satisfied with u're comedy thanks!

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Enjoy kuwa na namba yangu japo maisha ni popote lakini uwezi kuishi chooni <mapenz ulaya africa biashara kama kutoa ni moyo basi kujumlisha ni figo by melky by torong kindimb

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Enjoy kuwa na namba yangu japo maisha ni popote lakini uwezi kuishi chooni <mapenz ulaya africa biashara kama kutoa ni moyo basi kujumlisha ni figo by melky by torong kindimb

Guest (Guest) on May 28, 2026

hii noma

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Jamaa alikula chakula bila kusali akaona chakula sio kitamu by chelew hapo torongi kindimba

Guest (Guest) on June 21, 2026

Umetisha

Guest (Guest) on June 26, 2026

BAHATi0702990167

Asajo the great (User) on May 8, 2026

I have satisfied with u're comedy thanks!

Susan Wangari (Guest) on May 22, 2024

Hii joke imenikumbusha enzi zile! πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚

Guest (Guest) on February 10, 2026

ni maukali sana

Guest (Guest) on February 28, 2026

WAPI

Guest (Guest) on May 9, 2026

Safi sana

Guest (Guest) on June 15, 2026

hatar

Guest (Guest) on May 24, 2026

Oy niaj apo

Guest (Guest) on June 26, 2026

Mambow

Guest (Guest) on June 22, 2026

Iko poa

Guest (Guest) on May 23, 2026

.

Guest (Guest) on February 9, 2026

PWWW

Guest (Guest) on January 29, 2026

Juliana cheyo

Guest (Guest) on May 2, 2026

HATARI

Guest (Guest) on May 9, 2026

Mm leo mke wangu katoka asubuhi namuulizia unaenda
Wap amenijibu nijue yangu yake haya nihusu hapa nipo kumupeleka kwao ambako yanawahusu

Guest (Guest) on May 4, 2026

Nimefurah sana

Guest (Guest) on May 24, 2026

Mamb fat

Guest (Guest) on March 30, 2026

ww mimi fatu unanikumbka

Guest (Guest) on May 9, 2026

Fatu mamb

Guest (Guest) on December 27, 2025

Enzi zip?

James Kawawa (Guest) on May 9, 2024

Napenda vile mnaweka jokes kila siku! πŸ˜†πŸ‘

Isaac Kiptoo (Guest) on May 4, 2024

πŸ˜‚πŸ‘ŒπŸ˜†πŸ˜Š

Guest (Guest) on March 4, 2026

Nice

Esther Nyambura (Guest) on April 13, 2024

Mna kipaji cha ucheshi! πŸ‘πŸ˜‚

Guest (Guest) on May 25, 2026

Xxx

Andrew Mchome (Guest) on March 26, 2024

πŸ˜‚πŸ‘πŸ˜…πŸ€£

Nancy Kabura (Guest) on January 18, 2024

πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜†πŸ˜…

Guest (Guest) on March 7, 2026

Mambo ni fire

Nancy Kabura (Guest) on January 12, 2024

Wow, hii kichekesho ni mshindi kamili! πŸ†

Guest (Guest) on June 18, 2026

Nimekubali

Betty Akinyi (Guest) on November 1, 2023

πŸ˜† Ninakufa hapa!

Faith Kariuki (Guest) on October 19, 2023

πŸ˜„ Dhahabu ya vichekesho!

Guest (Guest) on February 15, 2026

vichesho vipya

Catherine Naliaka (Guest) on October 11, 2023

πŸ€£πŸ˜†πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Tuko

Jane Muthui (Guest) on October 2, 2023

πŸ˜„ Umeshinda mtandao leo!

Janet Mbithe (Guest) on September 11, 2023

Hii imenifurahisha sana! πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜…

Lucy Kimotho (Guest) on September 6, 2023

Nilihitaji kicheko hiki, asante kwa kushiriki! πŸ˜…

James Kawawa (Guest) on July 4, 2023

πŸ˜‚ Siwezi kuacha kucheka!

Paul Kamau (Guest) on June 25, 2023

πŸ˜„ Umenishika vizuri!

Jackson Makori (Guest) on May 24, 2023

Hii ni kali sana! πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

Sharon Kibiru (Guest) on May 18, 2023

Ninashiriki hii na marafiki zangu mara moja! πŸ˜†

Janet Sumaye (Guest) on May 11, 2023

Ucheshi wenu unanifurahisha kila siku! πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚

David Nyerere (Guest) on April 21, 2023

Hii imenifurahisha hadi nacheka kwa sauti! πŸ€£πŸ˜…

Asajo the great (User) on May 8, 2026

Emb cheka tuone!

Guest (Guest) on December 24, 2025

Chemsha bongo

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Kitu gani kina panda akichuki?ΒΏ shemsha bongo __......by.......melky boy

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Kitu gani kina panda akichuki?ΒΏ shemsha bongo __......by.......melky boy

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Kitu gani kina panda akichuki?ΒΏ shemsha bongo __......by.......melky boy

Guest (Guest) on June 28, 2026

Kitu gani kina panda akichuki?ΒΏ shemsha bongo __......by.......melky boy

Jackson Makori (Guest) on April 20, 2023

Ucheshi wenu unanifurahisha! πŸ˜ŠπŸ˜‚

Related Posts

Mchaga aliyemshangaza Mungu

Mchaga aliyemshangaza Mungu

Mchungaji anawaambia waumini: Fanya jambo moja la kumshangaza Mungu…

Read More
Cheki huyu jamaa anavyoungama kwa padri sasa

Cheki huyu jamaa anavyoungama kwa padri sasa

JAMAA: Baba Padri nimekuja kuungama
PADRI: Haya
JAMAA: Niliiba kamba
PADRI: Kamba?... Read More

Cheki kilichotokea baada ya kufumaniwa

Cheki kilichotokea baada ya kufumaniwa

Nimefumaniwa hapa na jamaa ameniambia nitulie tuyamalize kishikaji, yaani nisijali sasa ... Read More

Ikitokea hii kwenye chumba cha mtihani

Ikitokea hii kwenye chumba cha mtihani

Upo kwenye chumba cha mtihani,
maswalii yamekupiga kinyama
Unaamua kuchukua smartphone ... Read More

Jinsi mzunguko wa elimu ulivyo

Jinsi mzunguko wa elimu ulivyo

01.πŸ‘‰ Wale wanafunzi walioongoza
Mashuleni, wanaenda kwenye
Engineering na Medical sc... Read More

Cheki wanachokisema vichaa baada ya kuona ndege inapita angani

Cheki wanachokisema vichaa baada ya kuona ndege inapita angani

Vichaa wawili walikuwa wamekaa sehemu ghafla ikapita ndege angani kichaa mmoja akasema ndege ile... Read More

Tofauti ya mwanamke wa Kizaramo, Kitanga, Kihaya, na wa Kichaga

Tofauti ya mwanamke wa Kizaramo, Kitanga, Kihaya, na wa Kichaga

Mwanamke wakizaramo: Unampa hela ana nunua dela anaenda ana msutia jirani, anali... Read More

Raha ya kuoa kijijini

Raha ya kuoa kijijini

Kuoa vijijini raha sana Hata ukiulizwa unafanya kazi gani ukiwaambia mimi ni admin basi ... Read More

Sipendi ujinga. Cheki nilichokifanya

Sipendi ujinga. Cheki nilichokifanya

Nimeingia chumban nikakuta panya wamekula dawa yangu ya minyoo,

N... Read More

Kilichotokea baada ya jambazi kuvamia kanisa

Kilichotokea baada ya jambazi kuvamia kanisa

Jambazi mmoja aliingia kanisani na bunduki akapiga risasi juu ya bati akasema "asiyempenda YESU a... Read More

Tofauti ya mke na mchepuko!!!

Tofauti ya mke na mchepuko!!!

MKE NA MCHEPUKO.

Mke ni kama Tv na Mchepuko ni kama Simu.
Nyumbani unaangalia Tv lakin... Read More

Dongo kwako kama una degree moja Halafu unachagua kazi

Dongo kwako kama una degree moja Halafu unachagua kazi

Mtu una degree 1 unachagua kazi! Wakati thermometer ina degree 100, inafanya kazi kwenye kwapa.<... Read More